


She is Far Away from Me

by preraphhobbit



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Fluff, Multi, Other, in Ered Luin Kili's true love awaits, in which all that business about walking in the stars wasn't about Tauriel after all, kinda anti-Tauriel so don't read it if you like her, there is someone waiting for him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-15
Updated: 2014-01-15
Packaged: 2018-01-08 19:25:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1136470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/preraphhobbit/pseuds/preraphhobbit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Kili confesses his true love to Tauriel. To be imagined immediately after the end of DOS, but not before Smaug leaves the mountain.</p>
            </blockquote>





	She is Far Away from Me

**Author's Note:**

  * For [KilisParasites](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KilisParasites/gifts).



> This was all my friend's idea don't blame me

Delirious on the table, he reached for the light beyond him.

"Lie still," the red-haired elf commanded, pressing the kingsfoil to his wounded knee.

"You cannot be her," Kili moaned. "She is far away. She...she is far, far away from me. She walks in starlight in another world. It was just a dream. Do you think she looked have loved me."

For a moment, Tauriel's grip on his leg weakened, her heart thrumming in her chest. How ridiculous to feel such things for a dwarf- a grunting, hairy, horrible dwarf, of all the creatures in Middle-Earth. Yet somehow is words touched her, deeply, and her feelings could not be denied.

Later, she sat next to him at the window. He was awake now, coherent and breathing steadily, still pale as the moon but alive. His knee was bandaged so much he could hardly bend it. They were alone in the ramshackle house- Bofur and Oin had gone to find Bard, who had left the night before with his son and disappeared. The girls were asleep, recovering from the long and strenuous night. It was just her and him, alone. She went up and folded her legs under her, sitting across from him.

"Hello," he said, smiling at her, and she felt the peculiar thrum again. Ridiculous.

"Hello." It came out stiffer then she'd meant. "I...wanted to talk to you."

"Oh?" He drew his good leg up, making more room for her on the seat. She adjust herself, running her long fiery hair over one shoulder.

"Yes...you...you said something. In your delirium. About she who...who walks in starlight. And I thought...well, I wondered who you spoke of."

Something in his dark eyes glittered and he lowered his head, smiling shyly. "Oh. Yes. Her."

Her heart skipped a beat. Her. It wasn't her, wasn't Tauriel. What was this strange disappointment?

"Yes...her," he was saying. "I left her behind, in Ere Luin. My one true love. So hard, and yet so beautiful- so sweet. My heart aches to be parted from her. I wonder if she waits for me."

"What's her name?" Tauriel asked, still clinging to a faint thread of hope- hope that he loved her, which until that moment, until that moment when she thought his love was not for her after all, she had no even realized she wanted.

"Wanda," he said, and the name rolled off his tongue richly, lovingly. Tauriel felt as though the Morgul wound she'd healed for him had suddenly been opened in her chest.

"Wanda...my beautiful Wanda, so far from me. She really did seem to walk in starlight. That was how magical she was. And I dreamt of her, in my stupor. Dreamt of me coming to her. She no longer waits, I thing. She's been cracked, her love for me shook out to the wind. But I will never forget her. Never. She waits for me, in another world. Someday I'll see her."

"Who is she? This Wanda? Describe her for me." To form an image in her mind of the woman- was it a woman? Dwarf or another Elf or even a human, perhaps?- who had stolen his heart so that her own stolen heart could not be given back.

"Well...she's small. Very small. You could hold her in the palm of your hand. Skin pale, pale brown, bumpy, but so smooth...I remember when I first saw her, in the trees. I knew she had to be mine."

"Is she an elf, then?"

He gave her a strange look. "What? No."

"But dwarves don't climb trees..."

He laughed. "Oh, she's not a dwarf or an elf."

"A woman, then."

"No." He laughed harder, raking his long brown hair off his forehead. "My Wanda...she is the most beautiful walnut ever to grow in Middle-Earth."

"A what?"

"Not a what, a walnut. My sweet, sweet walnut, my Wanda. Oh, how I long to see her again. Perhaps I will. But I'm sure she's found someone new to love her. Of course they'll never love her as I did."

"A walnut."

"Yes." He leaned his head against the window, staring out towards the grey sky with his eyes shining, as though Wanda were before him. "My beautiful walnut."

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [She Walks In Starlight](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1136870) by [SamanthaBlue](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SamanthaBlue/pseuds/SamanthaBlue)




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